Pandorum

"Holy zombie apocalypse! I wanted to see a hardcore sci-fi movie, and I ended up watching another freaking zombie movie?" Something along these lines was going through my mind halfway through Pandorum.

But oh no, Pandorum is so much more than another zombie flick. Yes, there are zombies in it. Legions of flesh eating, martial arts skilled zombies. They're not called like that of course, but the resemblance to, let's say, the dudes from "I am Legend", is uncanny.

I think the writers knew zombies movies have been done to death and they were ideas hunting: the complete destruction of Planet Earth? Nope, it's been done before. A ship carrying our last hope? Done before. Something about cryogenics? Done before. Space dementia? Done before, and much, much better. Colonising alien worlds? Done before. Erm, spaceship with people crawling on dark corridors with blood smeared all over themselves, running away from some evil monsters? Done, done, done.

Well, then, how about ALL THOSE THINGS PUT TOGETHER?

And so we end up with Pandorum, an amazing mess of a sci-fi/horror movie, that in the end still manages to save itself from, well, itself, by having a few plot twists and a cool ending that I really wasn't expecting.

The plot? Well, as I said, spaceship, mission: last hope of humanity, zombies, space dementia, cool ending.

Rating? 6/10. Could have been much worse.

The Men Who Stare at Goats (the book)

Oh man, where do I begin?

Let's start the way the author starts, by saying "This is a true story". Is it really? We have no way of knowing that, of course. Jon Ronson is a journalist and this book is meant to be (not only a bestseller and the base of a movie script to be turned into a future blockbuster, but also a) journalistic investigation.

It most certainly speaks about real events and real people. Events like the Waco incident, the mass suicide of Heaven's Gate cult members, the Abu Ghraib tortures and scandal, Guantanamo Bay torture allegations, Project MK-Ultra and so on. Real people like several Generals and other ex-military people, ex-CIA, ex-Guantanamo Bay prisoners, plus celebrities like Uri Geller and Art Bell.

But that's where the verifiable stops and the insanity begins. Jon Ronson, in his 2 years long investigation of the usage of unconventional methods by the US military and the CIA, claims to have slipped quite deep down the rabbit hole. How real is this rabbit hole and how real are the claims of the people he had interviewed, that we can't possibly know for sure any more.

So the books essentially leaves us with a lot of questions, rather than answers. But those questions are worth asking and the trip in itself is mind-boggling, tragic, comic, absurd and... vonnegut-esque.

I'm looking forward to the movie (with George Clooney, Jeff Bridges, Ewan McGregor, Kevin Spacey), although I half expect to be disappointed (why in the world did they insist of making it into a comedy??)

Planet 51

Ok, so since I set myself the goal to review all of the movies I watch (mostly for myself, to keep track of it), I guess it's only fair to review Planet 51, an animated film (not Pixar though, this one's made by Illion and it's actually their first movie).

Now this movie got pretty bad ratings and even worse reviews. It rips off a lot of stuff from other movies (the robotic probe, Rover, is clearly inspired by Wall-E), the plot is predictable and also has been done before (see Battle for Terra), the humour is either too non-offensive or too offensive, depending on the reviewer.

I, on the other hand, found myself entertained by this movie (and to be honest, that's all I expected from it. If you want something deeper I guess you should look in some other places than an animation about aliens, that targets mostly teenagers).

The movie is filled with cultural references, including the title. I guess it's the only way in which it entertains. So we have there: Area 51 (the name of the planet hints at it, and there is actually a secret underground military base in a desert of the planet), the hippy movement, the UFO community movement, conspiracies surrounding NASA (the robotic probe manages to completely miss the civilisation on Planet 51, due to its obsession for collecting and photographing rocks), sci-fi, fanzines, horror flicks from the 50s, plus many other references to movies like Alien, Terminator, E.T.

About the plot: A superficial, charismatic, incompetent but well-intended American astronaut lands on Planet 51 expecting to find it devoid of life. But the planet is harbouring a civilisation of green and cute people (they also have antennas!) that are in a development stage corresponding to the American 50s. Now the astronaut, with the help of a few locals, must try to escape the local military, who view him as a threat (and also want to experiment on him), and get to his ship in orbit before it leaves without him.

Make what you will of it, but I give it a 6.5/10.

P.S. And I definitely liked it better than Battle for Terra.

Vrruuum, vrrrrrruuum!

The climate summit in Copenhagen has started today.

And if you close your eyes and listen very carefully, you will hear a very faint sound in the distance.

Is it the sound of polar bears and whales cheering?

No.

It's the sound of limos and private jets.

Vrrruuuum, vrrrruuuuuuuum!

Cum am vazut eu alegerile (pe Antena 3)

Privita retrospectiv, seara de ieri a avut un potential comic enorm. Pacat ca aseara nu am reusit sa ma amuz totusi prea mult.

Singurul post de televiziune pe care am reusit sa il urmaresc pe internet a fost Antena 3. Si asta cu sincope. In vreo 3 minute dupa inchiderea urnelor si anuntarea rezultatelor exit poll-urilor, Antena 3 a anuntat ca avem un nou presedinte, l-a felicitat respectuos pe "Domnul Presedinte" (???) si a incheiat apoteotic cu o muzica victorioasa, in timp ce pe ecran se derulau imagini cu Mircea Geoana aka Prostanacul, acest Winston Churchill al politicii romanesti.

Eu am crezut ca au terminat si ca pleaca acasa, dupa cum prezentasera lucrurile. Ce naiba mai era de adaugat?

Dar nu, s-au intors in studio, si cu vreo 30 de invitati, unul mai inversunat ca altul, au continuat timp de vreo 4 ore sa discute rezultatele alegerilor. Si prin "discutat rezultatele alegerilor" vreau de fapt sa spun ca l-au barfit pe Basescu si pe alegatorii lui. Am inteles urmatoarele lucruri din dicutia aia: Basescu e un loser, alegatorii lui niste idioti (deh, nu putem fi toti la fel de destepti ca Judetul Dolj), Basescu o sa incerce el sa faca rivulutie, ca numai la asta se pricepe, o sa incerce sa fure alegerile samd.

Despre Geoana nu a vorbit nimeni, ca la urma urmelor, ce mama ma-sii poti vorbi despre Geoana. Numai Geoana a vorbit putin despre Geoana, si ne-a asigurat de vreo 5 ori, in 5 discursuri diferite, ca el se mai distreaza ce se mai distreaza si dupa aia se apuca serios de treaba.

Deci cam asta am inteles eu din seara de ieri. N-am vazut nici cea mai mica urma de jurnalism serios, independent, nepartinitor, obiectiv. M-am dus confuza sa ma culc, si de dimineata Basescu il devansase pe Geoana, conform rezultatelor partiale. Imi pare rau ca nu pot sa ma uit acum la Antena 3.

Paranormal Activity

Last night I watched Paranormal Activity. After reading good things about it, I had high hopes and also I was sure that it will scare the day light out of me, so I took some precautions: had my boyfriend in the other room ready to intervene if I get too scared, had some cookies, low light, a blanket to put over my head at the very scary parts.

In the good tradition of "Blairwitch Project" and "rec", Paranormal Activity is filmed as a "home made tape" and marketed as a "true story". Unlike Blairwitch Project, it misses the novelty factor. Unlike rec, it misses the action and brilliant acting. So even if overall there were a few creepy scenes, I didn't jump out of the couch, didn't cover my head with the blanket, didn't yell for my boyfriend, and I slept like a child last night.

A little about plot of the movie: Katie and Micah are a young couple living in a suburban house. Recently Katie began to experience again phenomena she had also experienced as a child, and that seems to be caused by a demonic presence. Her boyfriend buys a video camera to document what is happening, and things get progressively worse as the demonic presence manifests itself more and in more violent ways.

I'd say 6/10 for this movie.

Glazed Eyed Mall Zombies

Today I spent a few hours stalking people in a Mall in Berlin. All for a good cause, of course. That is: getting the credit points for an Ethnology seminar and never having to hear the term "participant observation" again in my life.

The project is about the influence that the architecture of shopping centers has on our behaviour as costumers. Well, it's more about learning to apply research methods in social sciences, but the subject of my project is "the space factor in Malls".

And now let's get to the interesting part. Doing a little research on the internet before the field part, I came across something called "the Gruen transfer". Quoting from Wikipedia:

The Gruen transfer refers to the moment when a consumer enters a shopping mall, and, surrounded by an intentionally confusing layout, loses track of their original intentions. Spatial awareness of their surroundings play a key role, as does the surrounding sound and music. The effect of the transfer is marked by a slower walking pace and glazed eyes.

So, if you, like me, ever wondered why you find Malls confusing, why you become disoriented and find yourself wandering aimlessly through a maze of stores that sell stuff you don't really want to buy, now you have an answer. You're dazed because someone put a lot of effort into constructing a space that will bedazzle you. Then, bombarded by commercials and appealing shop windows, you'll end up buying something you did not intended to buy. We've all been there.

I didn't figure out yet how much of this also applies to supermarkets, but my guess is it's the same concept there.

Introductions, etc.

So this is, if I'm not mistaken, the 43565645th blog i ever started. And the second version of another purple alien blog I literally lost on the vast internet (can't remember the exact name or site it was on). Yeah, I'm THAT smart.

I'll be blogging (assuming I won't get bored again) about life as a (legal) alien, Berlin, multi-culturalism, the internet, about how mind-boggling boring my life is, food, cats, academia, love, books, movies and how my day was. I'll be blogging in English, Romanian and hopefully in German too, depending on my mood and on the topic.I will be blogging for myself and myself only. Anyone reading it, do it at your own risk.

And now let's get to business!